Family Matters Pt 1

Family Matters Pt 1

If I’m ok we’re ok.   No!  If you’re ok we’re ok.  

Main Text: Gen. 

John 16 - When the Holy Spirit comes, He will lead you into all truth.

It was always her fault. I thought she was the problem. 

Gen 2:18-25

helper comparable to him - This phrase indicates that this helper (or partner) would be truly fitting and fully adequate—just right. 

Some think that the term is demeaning, but it simply means “one who helps.” Infact, “helper” is used to describe God when He comes to our aid. It does not refer to someone who is secondary or inferior.

Marriage is the safest relationship on earth when God is honored. 

You have a 100% chance of success in marriage when you do it God’s way.  

In marriage, a man is to leave his family, join his wife, and unite with her. 

Though this process establishes a new home distinct from the parents’, it does not sever all ties with the extended family. 

The parents, who were the immediate family up to that point now become the extended family. 

In the biblical period, extended families were close and interdependent. Though families should still close they should not be domineering in the marriage. 

In marriage, man and woman are a “we,” not just a “me and you.” One flesh suggests both a physical, sexual bonding and a lifelong relationship. 

There are still two persons, but together they are as one. We will deal with this more when we get to Ephesians 5. 

In the NT, Jesus refers to this text as the foundation of the biblical view of marriage.

Matt. 19:4-5

Every marriage involves two imperfect people. 

It not only is personally challenging to work out difficulties within marriage, but it should also be a spiritual goal. 

The enemy is always seeking points of vulnerability to work his destruction in our lives (1 Pet. 5:8). 

Our temptation to fulfill our interest and defend ourselves in our marriage relationship makes our marriage vulnerable to the enemy. 

The accuser will point out and exaggerate our spouse’s faults and will feed anger and unforgiveness in our hearts towards our spouse.

Jesus warns that marriages will break down when hardness of heart is allowed to grow (Mark 10:4, 5; see also Prov. 28:14). 

Be careful to not give the enemy a foothold to breed unforgiveness towards your spouse through 

- hardness of heart to unbelief (Mark 16:14)
- lack of understanding (Mark 5:32), 
- pride (Dan. 5:20)
- stubbornness (2 Chr. 36:13).

We are to: 

- encourage one another “lest any of you be hardened” (Heb. 3:13)
- to let our words lift with encouragement (Heb. 10:24, 25), edification (Rom. 14:19), thankfulness, and prayer for one another (Phil. 1:3, 4) as we watch over, care for, and build up our marriages.


Four Laws of Marriage 

v. 24-25

Adam and Eve didn’t have a mother - Adam and Eve won’t have belly buttons 

Laws create order, safety and predictability.


  1. Law of Priority

- leave - when you leave you become one with your spouse. Your reprioritize your parents. 
- blood is thicker than water. Spirit is thicker than blood. 
 
God is a jealous God.  You don’t become jealous if you don’t love. 

Jealousy - intolerant of rivalry. 

Jealousy fights for the integrity of the relationship. 

One in four relationships fight every week over social media. 

Your kids don’t come first. They are a temporary assignment. What’s left when they leave?


  1. Law of Pursuit. 
- cleave - pursue. 

Proverbs 18:22

1 Cor. 6:16 - “Do you not know that your bodies are members of Christ? Shall I then take the members of Christ and make them members of a harlot? Certainly not! Or do you not know that he who is joined to a harlot is one body with her? For “the two,” He says, “shall become one flesh.” But he who is joined to the Lord is one spirit with Him.”


harlot - a) a woman who sells her body for sexual uses a prostitute, a harlot, one who yields herself to defilement for the sake of gain.  b) any woman indulging in unlawful sexual intercourse, whether for gain or for lust
- some woman are trying to be found a wife while still acting like a girlfriend. 

- some men are still trying to find a wife while you’re chasing a girlfriend. 

Marriage doesn’t work unless you serve each other. You can’t meet your own needs.  

Marriage takes work. 


  1. Law of Partnership. 

- become one flesh. 

God’s not going to send you someone else’s spouse. 

Dominants doesn’t work in marriage. 


  1. Law of Purity. 

They were physically naked without any shame. 

Stop trying to change your spouse. 

Submit to the Lordship of Jesus Christ. 

Submitting is taking the divinely ordered place in a relationship. 

Submission can never be required by one human being of another; it can only be given on the basis of trust. Submission can only come by way of believe God’s Word and being willing to learn to grow in relationships.

Ephesians 5:22-33

Believers are called to live in mutual submission to one another (v. 21). 

This applies in a unique way to the husband/wife relationship (v. 22).

The wife is called to submit to her husband “as to the Lord,” to respect, regard and deeply care for him (Greek phobeo, “to reverence” or “to be in awe of,” v. 24; 1 Pet. 3:5, 6). 

This points toward her serving her husband, honoring him, and edifying him (building him up). 

Her attitude, according to this terminology—“as to the Lord”—is to be one of highest esteem and regard.

In and even more important way the husband is called to lay down his life for his wife. 

He is to sacrifice his own interests in order to enhance hers. 

His role is to nourish and to cherish his wife. 

Nourish -  ektrepho¯, to support her growth toward her own maturity.

Cherish -  thalpo¯, to warmly care for and attend to.

In this way, each marriage partner contributes to bringing the other their full potential.

A marriage lived out in this mutually loving environment mirrors the interactive love that Christ has for His church and His church is called to have toward Him.



As part of PART 2……..

1 Corinthians 11:3

1 Corinthians 7

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